Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Distorting Dreams
Lonely girl, trapped in a condescending world distorting dreams, screaming reach for the stars yet cautioning not to steer far from reality. Now she's lost, stuck somewhere in between, striving for success, all the while maintaining a pretty smile as authority tells her she's a pretty child but chances of her amounting to anything is pretty mild. Refusing to be devastated, she uses critism as motivation, destroying any doubts laid out, consisting of her amounting to nothing, buffering the sounds of those imposing on her dreams, seeking her demise, disguished as caring friends, pretending to give a shit about where she fits into society but honestly wanting her to fail. Despite lack of support, she sails, better yet she soars, sweeping past those who have held her back before, realizing that all the while they were disguished to benefit themselves and realistically she is by herself, all alone, trapped in a condescending world, expected to fend for her own.
Monday, April 13, 2009
In The Moment
Warm air brushes my ear as you whisper sweet nothings that sound so sincere, but I know are false. But I have nothing to lose, so I engage in this fantasy, taking in everything you're saying at all cost. It's a price that I'm willing to pay to stay in this extasy, refusing to wait another day though I could take my time, spend this moment with some other guy. Instead I'm stuck in this moment in time, soaking in your lies, mesmerized everytime you stare into my eyes. Caught in a trance, driven by the slight chance that words uttered in this moment may be true, allowing myself to be naive and believe the nothings that seem so real, soft lips that graze my cheek as I refuse to speak, drifting away, too lost in this moment that we have. But, in the aftermath, I laugh aloud as you sleep, wondering aloud why I allowed myself to be so weak. Not caught up in ideas of you or me, too concerned with living out a fantasy that has now ended. And as I question your motives and mine I come to find that you aren't the only one that has lied. I tried to convince my myself that I was the victim, feeding into the lies of you, I have realized that you weren't the only one being untrue. I fell into the role of a girl misused when the truth is that I used you too. There was no trance, nor was I weak. And I definitely was not was naive, just a girl looking to satisfy needs. I fed into your lies only because they were compatable with mine. I played the role you were looking for, the vulnerable girl that longed for more, and you were the nice guy that was sly enough to cross the line.
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